Mindfulness: The First Responder To Fear

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first responder badge

Mindfulness is a successful approach to addressing Fear and Stress that has a proven track record of over 6000 studies worldwide over the past 40 years. It is effectively being used in healthcare, the workplace, schools, the military and many other areas of society. In addition to being used as a fear/stress reducer, it is an excellent approach to personal growth and the peak performance experience. Many professional and amateur athletes as well as other performers utilize these skills to enhance their their areas of expertise.

Although Mindfulness has been practiced for thousands of years it is only the past 40 years where it has been put under the scrutiny of science. These studies and the stories of the thousands of people who are benefiting from the practice has elevated Mindfulness into the awareness of the world.

Mindfulness is the ability to keep one’s attention in the present moment. During times of fear and stress this present moment attention goes away as our biology of fear takes over. We go into fight or flight, the fear of survival intensifies and we disconnect as a way of coping with the fear. When we disconnect from our bodies, thoughts and emotions we lose the ability to act and take care of ourselves effectively. This disconnection can last for years. Mindfulness is the practice of reconnecting to these things in the present moment thereby giving a signal to the body that the danger has passed and we can come out of the fear generated by fight or flight. Once that happens we are able to normalize and then move into peak mode.

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Hope and Mindfulness

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purple flower in pavement crack

Hope is defined as an optimistic state of mind that is based on an expectation of positive outcomes with respect to events and circumstances in one’s life or the world at large. I’ve always felt that hope is a bridge to our better selves when used in a way that accentuates our better qualities. Like all bridges hope is no longer necessary once we cross over to the other side and realize what we have been hoping for. The temporary nature of hope does not lessen it’s importance in helping us navigate through life. When things are difficult it’s always good to be able to call upon hope and bring it back to the forefront.

I’ve noticed in my life that hope is more effective when fear is held in abeyance and doesn’t take over our lives. In some ways hope is an opposite of fear or rather a modifier of fear. In the face of fear hope can help us push forward to achieve our goals. It tells us that we don’t have to surrender to fear and allows us to use fear in a positive way. Hope doesn’t have to be a response to fear but in many cases it is.

I find that when I practice mindfulness it reduces fear and strengthens hope. The practice also strengthens qualities like kindness, compassion, gratitude and forgiveness all of which are supporting players in the world of hope. Those qualities help us to sustain hope and cross that bridge into the realization of our better selves. The thousands of research studies about mindfulness attest to this and my personal experience does too. To me the main benefit of mindfulness is it’s ability to put fear in it’s place. Fear is a positive response to a real danger but becomes a hindrance when it overstays it’s welcome. Mindfulness makes sure that it doesn’t overstay it’s welcome by preventing the autonomic nervous system from getting stuck in fight or flight thus perpetuating fear over long periods of time. As long as we keep fear in it’s place through the practice of mindfulness hope will flourish.

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Too Much Empathy

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two faces

The Many Uses of Mindfulness: Over-Empathy..The Dark Side

It may seem unnecessary to discuss the negative aspects of over empathizing since the quality of empathy is generally held in high regard as a positive human trait. However, over the years I have had many people come to me with mysterious ailments that had no standard medical or psychological explanation and because of that, made the sufferers increasingly anxious about their sanity. Recently there has been more attention paid to this in the research fields and the conclusions are beginning to point to what I experienced as a youth and into early adulthood.

I realized as a youth in the 1960’s that I could sense and share what other people were experiencing both good and bad. The bad is what alarmed me and caused me to seek answers because I couldn’t turn it off. I was fortunate to come across a person who was very familiar with this phenomena and explained to me that by merely focusing attention on someone it was possible for some people to experience the same physical, mental and emotional distress as the other. The light went on! It made perfect sense to me and with some mindfulness training which allowed me to keep my attention to myself and in the present moment, I was able to control the phenomena. I discovered that there was a thin veil between myself and others and that at times it was a matter of survival to keep that veil intact. To me it confirmed the concept of interconnectedness which opened up a whole new way of understanding my place in the universe.

It turns out that many, many people to varying degrees have this same issue. I find that people in the helping professions are particularly susceptible to this problem. They tend to be empathetic to a fault as it becomes confused and mixed up with compassion. These people want so much to help others that they give away too much of themselves and abdicate their own sense of self. In so doing, it opens them up to whatever is going on with the other person. Once this is pointed out, the same light that went on for me goes on for them. At that point it is a simple matter of some mindfulness training to keep their own sense of self intact and puts a stop to the flow of unwanted energy from others. This is accomplished without losing sensitivity to others and bestows a new objective understanding to the relationship of self to “not self”.

Although the helping profession seems to be most susceptible to this, it is a common problem for everyone and underlines yet another helpful use of mindfulness. On a side note, actors have discovered the usefulness of empathizing with method acting and with practice, can to varying degrees actually become the role they are in. Hopefully with good mindfulness training they can let go of their roles when they are done.

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The Many Uses of Mindfulness: Happiness, Positive Thinking, Abundance, Law of Attraction, Relaxation etc.

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hands holding gold coins

For many years I have paid particular attention to things people want such as abundance, happiness, ability to generate positive thoughts, law of attraction, relaxation and so forth. Being like all people, I too have had a personal interest in how I could embody these things and how I could teach it to others. I have read all the books, gone to the seminars, practiced the exercises and spoken to the leaders in these fields to get a better handle on what it takes to achieve these qualities that are valued by so many people. At the same time that I’ve been doing my research, I have continued to practice mindfulness and this has spanned over a period of more than forty years.

To my surprise I have discovered that although these qualities continue to be valued and movements continue to arise around them there is considerable doubt as to the ultimate value of the pursuit of these things. To make matters worse I have spoken with many people who teach these things who candidly admit that the various approaches they teach simply don’t work. There is acknowledgment that these techniques can provide temporary results but inevitably fall by the wayside. I think temporary results are fine and can open the door to a new way of being if approached mindfully. Usually these people have come to me to discuss mindfulness and want to know what it has to say about what they are doing.

Mindfulness has a lot to say about these things if my personal experiences and my interpretation of others experiences in mindfulness are being seen clearly. To begin with, happiness, positivity, relaxation, abundance and so forth are just part of the spectrum of human experience. There is the other side of the spectrum which if ignored can cross the border to denial and disconnection. At that point delusion can set in and a cascade of disappointment can become hard to bear. I think it’s great to fully experience the sought after states of being but only if the opposite states of being are welcomed just as much. This is where equanimity, active acceptance, non striving and letting go come in. The age old saying that the best way to achieve these things is by not trying to achieve them comes to mind as true in every field of human experience. There is a fine line to tread here to fully grasp and engage this process and the practice of mindfulness supplies the map and the missing link. It ultimately transforms the inner experience to reflect a new relationship with the world which in turn redefines the sought after experiences and provides a firm foundation of peace.

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Why Is The Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction Program So Effective?

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hand ok sign, sun behind

In order to figure out why MBSR training is so effective we need to look at what it is and how that relates to the core of stress related issues. We have come to learn that stress plays a role in so many negative ways and finding an approach that diffuses the core cause of these issues is very important.

The biggest problem with stress is when it becomes chronic and we become stuck in the fight or flight response. At that point we begin to deal with all the physical, mental and emotional changes that are designed to help us in the short run but become problematic in the long run if the system doesn’t normalize and return to balance. In many ways we can think of mindfulness based stress reduction as the antidote to being stuck in fight or flight. In that way it addresses the core of the problem.

The primary coping mechanism in fight or flight is our ability to disconnect from what is happening in the present moment. Considering the original purpose of fight or flight is to assure our survival in a situation of danger, possible death or injury, the ability to disconnect from those unwanted experiences can be a welcomed strategy. Of course with chronic stress this disconnection stays with us over a long period of time. We disconnect from our bodies, emotions and mind which causes many problems. The definition of mindfulness is paying attention moment by moment in a non judgmental way. As an antidote it brings you back in the present moment…into your body, mind and emotions. In so doing it breaks the stress cycle and provides the impetus to return the system to normal. MBSR Scottsdale Institute for Health and Medicine serves the entire MBSR Phoenix area needs.

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I’m Highly Sensitive. How Do I Toughen Up?

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man in large bubble

There is a certain percentage of the population that falls into the category of being highly sensitive. The good news is that being highly sensitive gives you added insight and experience into a lot of different situations. The bad news is that most highly sensitive people suffer from not being able to “handle” the experience and information that comes to them through their sensitivity. They become distressed in situations where less sensitive people have no reaction at all.

Over stimulation physically, mentally and emotionally are common among the highly sensitive. Because of this over stimulation there is a pressing need to rest and recharge on a regular basis where if that need is ignored often times it results in depression, sadness and anxiety to name just a few conditions. Some people are so sensitive that they over empathize with people and actually experience what the other people are experiencing. If they are with positive, healthy people then that is a good thing but all too often they fall prey to their over sensitivity/empathizing in negative situations and experience the negativity coming from other people , things and places. Healthcare providers are particularly susceptible to this and many of them actually take on the physical, mental and emotional distress their patients present with.

So how does the sensitive person toughen up? I’ve found that many highly sensitive people lack a core focus. What I mean by that is that they are not centered and connected to themselves and bodies. When our attention is not in our bodies it tends to drift and many times it drifts into negative situations. At that point the highly sensitive person will mistake someone or something else’s experience for their own. When that happens the highly sensitive person will absorb the “other” experience.

Until lately there has been no widely available training to help highly sensitive people “toughen up” and create a solid centered core in their own body. Mindfulness is the training that connects people to their own bodies and allows them to remain connected in the face of negativity. A mindful person will recognize and experience negativity as something other than who they really are and by focusing on the anchor of their own body will be able to “toughen up” and not be susceptible to the negativity coming from elsewhere. Mindfulness, or keeping ones’s attention in the present moment by being fully connected to the body has been around for a long time but has only relatively recently become known enough to be available to the broader population. Helping highly sensitive people “toughen up “ is only one of the many reasons to practice being present.

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The Many Uses Of Mindfulness: Fear

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man biting fingernails

When I first started meditating 45 years ago the driving motivation was fear. I had reached a point in my life when fear was present all the time. The fear influenced everything I experienced and I was ultimately driven to discover and resolve the cause. As I explored the present moment I was able to discover how the fear was affecting me physically, mentally and emotionally. Once I was able to get in touch with that visceral experience it forged the connection to go deeper and trace the roots. I was able to be present with and explore the things I was fearful of and ultimately traced it all back to the fear of dying which was something I had been aware of since very early childhood. I discovered through that introspection that all my other fears could be traced back to fear of dying. I also noticed that there was a connection to a lot of other physical, emotional and mental issues that fed on the fear. I had stomach issues that I could see were directly related and many other issues such as fear of public speaking that obviously stemmed from the constriction of fear.

As I went deeper into my fear I came across the realization that the fear of dying was an effective way of addressing survival. I looked deeply into the fight or flight response that is hard wired in our autonomic nervous system and concluded that because of my heightened fear I would have an advantage in a survival situation. The problem was that I was always in that heightened fear and deduced that it would be much better if I could call upon it only when I needed it. The more I was able to fully experience the fear in the present moment the more it started to go away. As I faced the fear of dying my nervous system began to change. The fear lessened and all the other “symptoms” of fear lessened too. Over the years I began to have dreams of dying and actually was able to practice dying in my dreams. That combined with my mindfulness practice put an end to my fear of dying and other connected issues and rewired my nervous system so that it wasn’t constantly in fight or flight. I have come to realize the importance of going deeply into the fear of dying. I have concluded that it is the root of all fear and is connected to many, many other issues. Mindfulness practice is a great way to explore this and is a great touchstone as we all embrace our own paths of exploring and resolving fear.

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Silence And Stillness In Mindfulness Practice

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boat on lake in moonlight

As I begin to write this blog it occurs to me that writing about the connection between mindfulness, stillness and silence is counter intuitive to the subject. That realization stops me dead in my tracks and makes me wonder if I can convey this idea without violating it. In any event I suspect this will be one of my shorter blogs….or it should be.

When I first started practicing mindfulness I discovered physical and mental restlessness, and a mind that was constantly hearing sounds and thinking thoughts. My life was much the same way in that I lived in a constant whirl of activity. As I developed my mindfulness meditation practice I discovered that gradually I was experiencing less restlessness and a sense of quiet. There is an argument to be made that this new found stillness and silence would spill over into my life and in fact that is what I have noticed. The grand epiphany is that my outer life does not need to be still and silent in order for me to sustain the inner stillness and silence. They are the engines of focus and attention. I have come to experience that two basic qualities of the present moment are stillness and silence. They seem to be the at the core of our essential being. I would liken them to the blank canvas of a painter who has the opportunity to create anything on that canvas.

So silence and stillness are always there, the balm of existence that allows for the arising of all experience. I found this in the present moment and it continues to deepen day by day.

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Can Mindfulness Help Overcome OCD And Anxiety?

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ocd cycle

OCD or obsessive compulsive disorder and anxiety can be addressed in multiple ways and mindfulness meditation is a very effective way that can enhance any other approach of your choosing. Both of these conditions respond well to positive lifestyle changes and certainly mindfulness meditation is a positive lifestyle change.

The research connecting mindfulness meditation and anxiety and OCD is plentiful. I wouldn’t know where to begin to reference different studies because there are so many that show positive outcomes with anxiety and OCD using mindfulness meditation. A lot of the research comes from Jon Kabat Zinn’s 8 week Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction program(MBSR)developed at the University of Massachusetts Medical Center. It is being taught all over the world and is present in practically all healthcare settings. To date there are over 2500 studies published worldwide. For those of you interested in the research I would suggest doing a specific internet search.

For those of you not inclined towards research and for the sake of brevity I will summarize the factors connecting OCD/anxiety, stress and mindfulness. I will do that by connecting them to mindfulness meditation and it’s use as a stress reduction program.

To begin with, we have discovered in the world of stress that we are not processing stress like we should. The big news in research is that the stress reaction(fight,flight or freeze) doesn’t resolve itself in many situations. The result is acute stress hanging around sometimes for years and becoming chronic stress. During fight,flight or freeze there are many physical, mental and emotional changes that take place. Imagine if those changes hung around for years and were pushed below the surface to keep them out of the way. It would create a host of issues.

One of the characteristics of fight or fight is fear. Fear in the short run is a very positive response. Fight or flight is our survival mechanism and without fear we wouldn’t be as effective at surviving. The problem comes when the fight or flight doesn’t resolve itself and the fear becomes chronic producing many iterations/expressions of itself over time. Anxiety and OCD are simply iterations/expressions of fear that hasn’t been resolved. Anxiety is generalized fear and OCD is a behavior that is designed to create the feeling of control. The need for control is driven by fear.

So how does mindfulness reverse chronic stress and fear thereby addressing the root driver to OCD and anxiety? When we go into fight or flight our main coping mechanism is our ability to disconnect from the present moment. It is very common to feel disconnected from our bodies, thoughts and emotions in this situation. In a short term situation it works well. In a long term situation it perpetuates the phenomena of being stuck in the fear/fight or flight mode. It’ s as if the body senses that because we are disconnected there is still danger and so it keeps us in fight or flight.

Mindfulness meditation is the process of paying attention to our bodies, thoughts and emotions in the present moment. We actually reconnect to those same things that we disconnected from in fight or flight. At this point it is as if the body senses that because we are re connecting, the danger must no longer be present. The result is that the body shifts the nervous system to come out of fear/fight or flight. The system gradually normalizes and fear goes away. Fear, the potent driver of anxiety and OCD resolves itself and is no longer energizing the anxiety and OCD. It is at this point that many mindfulness meditation practitioners discover the connection between fear, anxiety and OCD. As the fear from being stuck in fight or flight subsides so does anxiety and OCD.

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How To Create The Mindfulness Habit

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habits

We humans are called creatures of habit so it would make sense to explore how we can utilize our natural tendencies to create the mindfulness habit. Before I begin I would like to point out the irony of using habit and mindfulness in the same sentence. By definition, a mindful experience, or as I call it, “Mindfuling” is embodied with intention and therefore defies the habit description. Habits are usually thought of as things we do automatically. In mindfulness practice we do things to help break patterns/habits. Automatic patterns tend to create limitation so to the extent we can limit those patterns we can also stretch limitations and creativity. That being said, how can we create flexible mindfulness habits that are not written in stone but have a useful flow to them?

The first thing to consider is motivation. Without the proper motivation it will be difficult to sustain the necessary level of mindfuling. My experience has been that because mindfulness is so different from what we are used to it can be a challenge to stay with it. It is very helpful if there is a deep yearning to relieve a sense of discomfort of some sort. If that yearning is there then there is a good chance to stay with the practice on a regular basis. Once that happens it could be argued that a habit of sorts has been created. I’ve seen people practicing mindfulness because it is the new “in thing” and because they don’t want to be left out. These people usually don’t stick with it to any degree that will help. There is a lot of watered down mindfulness lately that is much easier to stick with but does not have the capacity to create lasting constructive change. However, it may plant a seed for some time in the future when the motivation is there.

The next factor to consider is the level of accessibility to reliable instruction. There is a lot of information out there and sometimes it is difficult to know what is good. I don’t know of any short cuts to figuring this out. Like anything else you need to do your research and do your best to know what seems right for you. There are lots of excellent books, videos, articles and other forms of information to choose from. The best by far is to find a teacher who will work with you in person. It can be individually but I find that medium sized groups are best. If the teacher is a good communicator, has a sense of humor and is experienced in mindfulness there is a good chance you will enjoy the learning experience. That in turn will complement the motivation and add to your ability to practice regularly. Once again, I hesitate to use the word habit so I’ll just stay with regularly. Other forms of contact with the teacher such as phone, video conferencing etc. can be very effective but the greatest impact is in person.

Once the two key elements of motivation and teacher are addressed we can look at some of the other factors to help us create flexible, mindful habits . Although we are practicing to be in the present moment it is wise to use mindful attention to do some constructive planning for the future. Simple practical ideas around time of day, environment, attitudes and posture help us to slip into our present moment practice of mindfulness meditation. For bringing mindfulness into daily activity the most important thing is remembering. Since mindfulness in daily life doesn’t require a formal shift, all we need to do is to remember to bring what we have learned from the formal practice into our daily lives.

Finally, experiencing heartening results helps us to keep the practice going. Although a key attitude is non striving, there is no denying that when we begin to achieve what we are not trying to achieve :-), enthusiasm will mix with motivation and instruction to create a potent habit infused with flexibility.

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